Plates of Cake
Plates of Cake Hasten the Advancement of Teenage Evil
Teenage Evil. There have been certain periods of history during which it has been considered a scourge, something to be combated via health class filmstrip or condemned via papal edict or at least obliquely addressed through sweeping public policy buried within reams of hastily passed legislation. This is not one of those periods. This is the period of the rise and championship of Teenage Evil, a bonafide craze that in the 1950s might have been perceived as “sweeping the nation,” perhaps not unlike radiation.
Teenage Evil is the new album from the band Plates of Cake. The band is composed of four gentlemen from New York City: Jonathan sings and plays the guitar. Josh plays the other guitar. Gann plays the bass. Ian plays the drums. They all met in Colorado, where three of them went to high school together. They’ve all done different things since then, but now they are unmistakably Plates of Cake.
Teenage Evil will incite the young people of this country and other countries to strike out against everything they find loathsome and harrowing about existence, from unrealistic academic demands to social networking to varsity sports. This is a dissertation written on the backs of record covers in blood that upon closer inspection turns out to be cadmium red cadged from art class.
A lot of people have said some very nice things about Plates of Cake, including Tiny Mix Tapes, Popmatters, My Old Kentucky Blog, and AM New York, many going so far as to forge neologistic phrases such as “slow-punk,” “sore guts,” “Episcopalian upbringing,” and “involuntary facial hair.” But it doesn’t really matter what they say, because, as we all know, words used to describe music are like words used to describe human feelings: ineffective.
But what is effective is listening to Teenage Evil. It is transportation. It is historical document. It is mania. It afflicts us all.
PLATES OF CAKE OBJECTS